when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
