I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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