your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
not ubering you a puppy
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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