you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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