It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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