I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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