so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
