i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
