thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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