thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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