have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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