I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
