I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
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