I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
this beer tastes like vomit already
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
