If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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