I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
