Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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