You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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