So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
