therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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