Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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