We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
