you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize