adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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