She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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