I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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