can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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