somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I am mentally ready for anal.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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