And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
