that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
