when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
