it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
