Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
