In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
