Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
