So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
