I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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