I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
