it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
