Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize