are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I would fuck him just for his dog
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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