woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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