singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Randomize
