Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
