I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
