Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
