walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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