Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
