But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
