Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize