Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I just blew my weed a kiss
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
